Mobile ads load the bases during MLB playoffs

If you follow sports, chances are you've noticed that ads for mobile operators, data services and handsets now dominate the seemingly endless commercial breaks throughout any given television broadcast--only beer, pizza and cars are advertised as extensively. In fact, device maker Research In Motion is the official sponsor of cable superstation TBS' coverage of this week's Major League Baseball divisional playoffs--when the games go to break, the scoreboard touts the BlackBerry brand. Factor into the equation interactive polling questions, fantasy applications and the like, and it's impossible to imagine the sports viewing experience without mobile's pervasive influence. So with apologies to the great ESPN.com columnist Bill Simmons (who pioneered the concept I'm about to shamelessly rip off), here's a running in-game diary tracking mobile's impact on Wednesday's playoff matchup pitting the Los Angeles Dodgers against my beloved Chicago Cubs.

6:30 PM ET: Nothing like an overhead blimp shot of Chicago's luminous Wrigley Field to establish the mood...a mood quickly destroyed by TBS's reminder that the Cubs haven't won the World Series in 100 years. You don't say. Thanks, TBS!

6:32 PM: Our first BlackBerry spot of the broadcast. It's like a bad acid trip--there are all these disconnected images of a dog, a little girl playing hopscotch, a guy golfing, a beach ball bouncing and some photos, and they all come together to form a mobile handset. "BlackBerry...Connect to everything you love in life" is the tagline. I guess the ad is illustrating all the things your phone can do, but the end result is just frustrating and confusing. Which come to think of it captures the mobile user experience in a nutshell. Truth in advertising--awesome! 

6:35 PM: Did you know the Cubs are also cursed? Thanks, TBS!

6:42 PM: Dodgers left fielder Manny Ramirez at the plate. I still can't get over how fans can shrug off all the absurd, divisive stuff he does with the explanation that it's just "Manny being Manny." At this point, the guy could murder a drifter and people would still tolerate it. When I submit a column like this, I like to imagine my editor laughs it off as "Jason being Jason"...but deep down I know she's thinking "I'm almost certain we can find an intern to do a better job for a fraction of the money."

6:46 PM: Our first Verizon Wireless spot of the broadcast. A secretary details her boss' schedule for the day, which consists mostly of sending text and photo messages. Apparently high-powered execs now mess around on their phones instead of sexually harassing their subordinates. I did not know that.

6:50 PM: Dodgers pitcher Derek Lowe faces off against Cubs first baseman Derrek Lee. Derek Lowe, Derrek Lee. Derrek Lee, Derek Lowe. Oprah, Uma. Uma, Oprah. (I'm officially annoyed with myself at this point, and we're not even through the first inning.)

6:58 PM: Now there's a BlackBerry advertisement behind home plate. Wow, RIM is really capitalizing on the weakness of the American dollar, huh?

7:04 PM: Another BlackBerry ad, this one advertising "EJ's Mailbag," a new TBS promotion inviting viewers to text baseball questions to TBS Sports studio anchor Ernie Johnson. Here's my question for Ernie: Does his studio co-host Dennis Eckersley walk into the barbershop and tell the stylist "I want to look like I just stepped out of Journey's ‘Separate Ways' music video"?

7:10 PM: Home run, Mark DeRosa! Cubs up 2-0!

7:14 PM: I just realized the first major flaw in this plan: When you've committed to watching commercials, you can't switch channels during the break. What was I thinking?

7:30 PM: Cubs pitcher Ryan Dempster gets out of a bases-loaded jam. I'd feel a lot better about our chances if we weren't cursed and stuff. Thanks, TBS!

7:31 PM: Our first Apple commercial, promoting games on the iPod touch. Say what you will about Apple, but the company knows how to sell its products: The graphics look outstanding, the accelerometer's expansion of gameplay possibilities boggles the mind, and there's absolutely no confusion over what the ad is promoting.

7:39 PM: I just realized another major flaw in this plan: If I have to sit still during commercials, how am I supposed to get another beer?

7:40 PM: Another BlackBerry ad. It's a lot like the first one, only this one promotes Facebook and Yahoo services in its parade of random images. I'm still kinda confused. 

7:43 PM: I'm disappointed that TBS appears to be forgoing interactive SMS polls during their broadcasts. I love those--they really capture the pulse of the fan base with their probing questions like "Whom would you rather have at the plate with the bases loaded in the bottom of the ninth: Manny Ramirez or Stevie Wonder?"

7:47 PM: And still another major flaw in this plan: I really, really need to go to the bathroom.

8:12 PM: Another bases-loaded situation for Dempster. I've got a bad feeling about this.

8:15 PM: ... and Dodgers first baseman James Loney hits a grand slam. Dodgers 4, Cubs 2.

8:16 PM: I just received a text message from another Cubs fan. I can't reprint it here.

8:21 PM: I feel like I've seen all of these commercials as many times as I've seen the Cubs choke in big games.

8:33 PM: I'm feeling a little tipsy. And by the way, have I ever told you guys how much I love you?

8:54 PM: Manny Ramirez just hit a home run--his 25th in postseason play, a new major league record. And he's rounding the bases with no pants! Okay, I made that part up. But it's totally possible, isn't it? Anyway, Dodgers 5, Cubs 2.

9:08 PM: In case anyone's forgotten, TBS just put up a helpful on-screen graphic reminding us that the Cubs haven't won the World Series in a full century. Thanks, TBS!

9:09 PM: It has nothing to do with mobile, but according to this Prilosec ad, Cheryl Ladd is a frequent heartburn sufferer. Good to know.

9:20 PM: Here's an ad for T-Mobile USA's Unlimited Family Plan. I'm too morose to be snarky.

9:35 PM: Another Dodgers home run. It's now 7-2. Wrigley's as quiet as a mausoleum. I'm past the point of texting obscenities to friends--I just want this game to end.

9:50 PM:  Game over. Cubs lose. On the plus side, I finally figured out why RIM spent so much money sponsoring these playoffs: To corner the market on fans that need to purchase a new phone after throwing their old one at the wall out of sheer frustration. That's marketing savvy. -Jason